Mirror mirror on the wall

I stared into the steel rails and wooden grills of our Toronto subway tracks on my way home the other night. I thought, “These old subway tracks have so much meaning; it holds such substance from me, to you.” Meaning also shifts as your life changes. In the recent 5 or 6 years, these tracks…

I miss me

This is pretty impromptu of me. This isn’t an actual post about anything. But I’m so alone right now. I’ve been suicidal again. I’m grieving…. About myself. I found this on reddit and I’m balling my eyes out now. I needed to share this for anyone who is grieving too. Bipolar isn’t just a moment…

My problem with this new Facebook trend

J.K. Rowling is known for her brilliance in writing fantasy. Through her beautiful words, she has also precisely summarized my feelings in this simple line: It’s so difficult to describe depression to someone who’s never been there, because it’s not sadness. It made me question why I pound in the meaning of depression and other…

Dear younger self

When I’m asked, “Why do you do this?” My answer is always, “Because I wish someone was there for me when I was growing up.” Anxiety and depression weren’t real then and you can bet there weren’t advertisements about it either. Our PSAs were more like, “Don’t you put it in your mouth / Don’t…

The death of me

I’m one for the dramatics and the title should be telling. Though I didn’t physically die, my former self sure got lost somewhere between an 8 year break up with my ex and my stay at a contemporary Sing Sing. I didn’t believe them when they told me I was bipolar. I was only jumping…